Friday 16 March 2018

You can be polite and still be real

I’ve been using the internet since its baby phase, where the connections were dialup and just one song took hours to download.

So I am well aware that sharing an opinion online, about anything basically, can potentially cause a lot of controversy and unnecessary drama, which both are things nobody wants and needs, but this is something I am honestly confused about.

Lately, on many different occasions, I’ve come across the following phrase: Say what you feel, it's not being rude, it's being real.

At first I didn’t think much of it, but as I was coming across it more and more, the more it got me thinking about it.  For me, the opposite of being real is being fake, and the opposite of rudeness is politeness, so I honestly cannot understand how being rude equates with being real.

In my opinion, rudeness has nothing to do with realness and these two should not be mixed up. People should not use realness as an excuse to be mean and offensive. True, you can feel any way you want about things; and, also true, you have the right to express those feelings. But you don’t have the right to express them in a way that’s offensive.

That is a choice you make. How something is worded, is up to you and you alone. You can be hurt, angry, disappointed, you name it, and still be polite. Bitter and mean words won't add anything to your realness; they'll only make you sound bitter, mean and pretentious. 

Additionally, once said, words can never be taken back. You can regret them, apologise for them, but no matter what, they will always have been uttered. And people may forgive you, but they will always remember what you've said and how you've made them feel.

“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
― Maya Angelou

Take care, 

M.

Friday 2 March 2018

Work hard, Play harder

What do you do when you are no longer enjoying something you used to love?

Firstly, make sure that's the case. Did you really stop enjoying so and so, or you just forgot how much you love it because every day burdens, life, work, washed away the fun element?

You took up so and so in the first place because you thought it was interesting and fun; remind yourself of that. You know yourself better than anyone, so the best person to get you pumped again, it's definitely yourself. 

But even if you no longer enjoy something you used to love, it's fine, stop worrying about that. We change, our taste in things changes, so it's only natural to drop some things as we grow, it's part of life. 

Secondly, having fun plays a very important part in our well-being, so make time for the things you enjoy, even if they seem silly, weird, childish, or no one else is interested in them; as long as it makes you happy and puts a smile on your face, it's great! Oh, and they should also be harmeless, both towards yourself and others, but for me, that goes without saying.

Thirdly, find like-minded people, so you can have fun (a.k.a. you can be weird) together. To an outsider you might appear odd (and that's putting it nicely), but you will be too busy having the time of your lives to care. 

And, lastly, try to always remember this: the rule is “work hard, play harder”, not “work hard, and if you have any time left, play”.

Until next time, 

M.